Jake and the Spar

Jake hopped from bad foot to bad foot to the local Spar, his trainers had holes in now both the bottom and top and he hoped no one would notice. His ears ached, and his hands went from grey to blue as the low winter sunlight reflected off a puddle. He was getting on now, Gail his girlfriend had died only a month ago and he had not ventured outside since. Scared of what to say in reply to people's condolences who knew him. 

He had given up, there was nothing worth living, for now, she had gone and he had spent the last 4 weeks staring at the end of bottle after bottle of whisky which was now randomly piled up in the corner of his kitchen waiting to be recycled. 

He had been so embarrassed to be seen drinking that he had gone to the Londis down the way, not wanting to be interrupted or seen, not even noticed by those who cared for him. However today was different, and he had decided to put his last pound and a bit of change from his DLA to a different use. He wanted people to see him and he had put on what he could find that wasn't so badly washed or stained and had ventured to the local shop instead.

"Hello Jake", was the immediate response as he entered the Spar, brushing his old trainers on the brown brush to wipe off any muck. It was the first time anyone had spoken to him for weeks and he looked over his shoulder and saw Linda behind the till.

"Hi", he said meekly, not wanting to start a deep conversation about his loss, but still wanting to engage with the humanity that still existed.

"I'm sorry to hear about Gail", Linda replied, and Jake instantly felt a bubble grow in the corner of his eye.

"I know, it was sudden, Lymphoma", he stated matter-of-factly and walked into the light of the shop, he pulled out his last pound and eagerly looked down the alcohol aisle for any cheap cider. There wasn't any today, the shop felt empty like he did, and somehow felt like he belonged.

He turned and looked at Linda. "I guess I'll have a scratch card" he said looking at the rows of cards. She duly pulled one out and scanned it.

"It'll get easier" she said, as she placed out her hand.

Jake gave her his last pound and took the card. He scratched off the card with his nails, overgrown, and still dirty. He had made an effort but not that much. He scrubbed off the last bit of grey and tossed it at Linda not even looking to see if he had won anything or not.

She looked him up and down, sorrow etched on her face, and just scanned it under the National Lottery machine without looking. She was too busy trying to catch Jakes's gaze, then came a beep. She looked at the machine and then Jake.

"You've won", she said, Jake looked up, hoping it was enough for another bottle of Scotch. Instead, he saw a big fat grin on Linda's face, maybe he could buy a couple of bottles was the only thought that raced through his mind.

"£250,000, Jake, you've won the top prize", Jake didn't know what to do, all that money, he was depressed and happy at the same time. Thoughts of drinking himself to death dissipated and instead, he smiled at Linda.

"I can't give it to you now", she said, "You will have to contact the National Lottery, but you've definitely won the jackpot". Jake smiled and grasped her outstretched hand to take the card back. The first human contact he had felt in weeks felt brand new, warm, and a feeling of belonging rushed through his mind. He took the card and said thank you to Linda who had a wide happy smile across her wrinkled but still young face. 

Time affects everybody he thought as he walked past her with a big matching smile reflecting the shop workers' grin. For once Jake knew what he was going to do with all that money. First on his bucket list was the important job of buying a new pair of trainers to replace these blackened old Lacrosse shoes on his feet, that had holes on the bottom from his big toe, matched by those on top.

Jake felt happy and excited for the first time since Gail passed away, and he didn't feel guilty for being so. Therefore, as he left the shop, and he walked tall and proud out down the street, looking passers by in the eye, and thanking those he knew from his estate when they offered condolences. 

As he strode happily. albeit with his limp from a work accident, all he could think about was the newly opened Kicks shop in his local town shopping centre. 

It was a temple for those people who wore brand new white treds every day, box fresh, before discarding them for another pair, dare they had got stains on them. He thought about doing the same with all the money he would be getting. It would be much easier than washing a set of white sneakers in a washing machine and then scrubbing stains off with a toothbrush. 

Now he could swap these old pair of loved Lacrosse which he had worn for years with a new pair of Treds. What pair would he buy first was all he could think about as he hopped like a pirate down the road. For the last few years on benefits, he couldn't afford to buy a replacement for his hole-ridden foot clangers. 

He would go into town with Gail, and then spend anything from 20 minutes to an hour, as Gail was in the Sainsburys opposite, staring and stroking the felt or leather of trainer after trainer. All the time just wishing he could afford a pair for his damp black sock-covered feet.

For once his mind was not full of dark thoughts about Gail passing away but instead, it was full of trainers, From s smart white pair of Fred Perry's, to the new Nike Pegasus FlyEase or he would even be able to buy a pair of the £560  Gucci Ace Embroidered Sneakers. The thought of being able to walk into Treds and not just watch shop but actually go to the till with a pair of expensive Gucci's or slip on old school Vans sent a thrill down his back. 

The choices just filled his head and he clasped the lottery ticket to his chest before stopping and carefully putting it into his wallet, however just as he was finishing putting his wallet back into a zipped pocket of his worn-out jacket, a neighbour, Steve, from 2 doors down was walking towards him and stopped alongside Jake.

"Hi Jake, it was sad news when I heard about Gail, are you okay?", the neighbour sincerely asked. However, instead of the usual sad reply Jake happily answered,

"Yes Steve, I've never been better for a while actually, thanks for asking", Steve looked a bit stunned, probably expecting a more saddened reply. Jake smiled at him and then carried on walking home. 

He knew what he was going to do when he got home. Ring the National Lottery for sure before going on the laptop Gail had taken home from her last job but had never returned due to her sudden illness.

Instead of heartache filling Jake's whole being he was planning on looking up TREDS website to see what new kicks they had in. He was so glad he had come out today knowing people would stop and talk to him, and instead of spending his last £1.50 on a can of K cider he had spent it instead on a winning lottery ticket. Suddenly the world did not look so dark anymore and he carried on limping down the road to his home.

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