I was in a gang of £20 rock stars,
Wanted 2 go to the moon but never got far.
Battered spaceship like a 2nd hand car,
Werner von Braun R NAZI science Tsar.
Quick sprinkles of ash from the back of my hand,
Flying off to space but got no NASA grandstand.
Clever enough to split atoms like the double slit,
Quantum flux waves, quarks spark a million bits.
I had Einstein's mind but the sense of a twit,
And 2 wonky legs both shattered to bits.
Still I checked the box for Schrödinger's cat,
Whether dead or alive, matters a fact.
Probably starved should hv thrown him a rat,
But then he's only dead if you hadn't checked that.
I said I'm gonna sort it out, and I gave God a shout,
Long waited 30 years but never heard nought.
It's bn a long time n I've survived many a drought,
Was Wuhan bat crazy masking just 2 go out.
My eyes got double blots N my minds gone blank,
My tongue got tied up in a chat that wasn't 2 Frank.
Got the sniffles and a cough from the rising damp,
Send U a card from space if I can afford the stamps.
But still nothing more than a yellow rocket star man,
Flying 2 the moon as fast as R wallets say we can.
Rocket fuels cheap bicarb powder stale like spam,
And electronic wiring that's as old as your gran.
One day R ships going 2 stop giving NASA's radar blips,
CIA's gonna make sure R boosters explode in2 a million bits.
Paranoia top mad too much time floating 2 think a bit,
Before our oxygen runs out and we all choke 4 shit.
It was an important mission, I was sure we could land,
Neil Armstrong's lodge helped draw us a plan.
Shame Kubrick wasn't around 2 put the film in the can,
Still did R best on Area 51's banned desert sand.
So did I wish I had changed jobs N become a man in a suit,
Door to door salesman briefcase full of scams 2 boot.
College wasn't hard so I always had time 2 toot,
N every boss was a thief so chose a life harder to loot.
© 2024 Robert Reid – All Rights Reserved
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