SKЯ3WBALLED

Monday, 6 January 2025

SKЯ3W

Skr3w, screw, barney McSkrew,

Screw them all and screw u too,

Been in a screw job n not 2 few,

Diablo witch screwed r whole crew.

Coz a screws a joe pullin u out of bed,

Stand by the wall put ur hands on ur head,

Open ur pockets and spins out ur bed,

A tru screw never 4gets a word uve said.

Coz a screw in the jaws pain u can't ignore,

Dental abcess my raw jaw is sore,

Too many meds n the floor is my whore,

N I can't even KO headbutting the door.

Coz a screw under my tyre is nothing new,

A skank neighbours plan n I've had a few,

Stuck roadside wiv nothing to do,

Ur wallets blank n ur mates r too.

Coz a screw on a driver is a tool jus right,

Always beware of that tool in a fight,

Plunge that shank n rotate it tight,

Bein pulled close as ur pupils unlight.

Coz a screw with a bird cud be overdue,

It could be the best screw u never knew,

Unthread ur stress the best u can do,

Unpop ur cork as ur nads turn blue.

Coz a screw aint a nail still I nailed it gd,

If u had to Google then u misunderstood,

That the thread of this Scr3w was meant 2 b good,

It only rhymes becoz I Skrewed it good.

Wednesday, 1 January 2025

Happy New Year SKЯ3W 2025

It's another a happy new year SKЯ3W,

N I'm not sure what to do.

I know nothing, I need a clue,

But still a Merry 2,0,2,5 Year to U.

We got a sky full of drones,

N AIs infiltrated all R phones.

And in very hushed tones,

There's probably Donald Trump clones.

The Palestinians war in Gaza,

Is still a genocidal palaver.

It's a sick racial carve up,

N we can't even post the drama.

N then we go to Ukraine,

Where the Democrats went insane.

Hunters Bio labs were a drain,

NATO thinkin nuclear wars jus a game.

But over here in the UK,

What can we now legally say?

Starmer's secret police is on its way,

Go N delete them social media memes away.

He ain't got the ppl on his side,

N there's probably gonna be a farmers strike.

Clarkson n Farage R causing riots,

N we're all waiting for a new plebiscite.

We got clashes with police violence,

Over Albanian coke dealing migrants.

Just know that Turkish barber parlance,

Is from their white snot stuck a mile up.

So what 2 say about me,

Life ain't been a great party.

I got winters jip on my metal knee,

N still no shrink will go near me.

And I got a diseased heart problem,

N a lil chronic liver disease problem.

Don't forget my swollen leg problem,

N a teeny weeny legal problem.

Now u might think a SKЯ3W,

Is an easy poem 2 pen, or do.

My rhymes r easy, but dark n blue,

But I recite wiv a gob full of glue.

But enuff about me,

We see this New Year in with glee.

N if an AI robot takes ur job pls,

Don't blame my own coding deeds!

So it's another New Year,

Go N pour another beer.

Don't shed any Skrewball tears,

Coz I still hope 2 spread some cheer!

Monday, 9 December 2024

Goodbye Dad

This goodbye poems to my Dad,

It's the hardest poem pen 2 pad,

N makes me so, so, sad,

I'm so, so, sorry I made u crazy mad.

Sorry for the short candle wick,

I know I was a proper dick.

Fucking about, getting nicked,

Fighting police n acting a prick.

Sometimes I thought we'd actually fight,

Drunken rows n throwing r might.

It didn't matter who was right.

I'd B upstairs angry 4 the night.

Argued over the kitchen table,

About war, politics, n news fables.

I was painted with a black label,

We'd make Mum cry, N go unstable.

I was ignored from around 14,

True, I was prob an awful teen.

But Lorna seemed 2 get all the glean,

Though she seemed just as mean.

I know I was on drugs very young,

Toking dubs, banging, acting dumb.

Still u always held ur tongue.

Even tho I was a black sheep son.

All those police 6 clock knocks,

I used to wake at 6 on the dot.

Pigs searching thru my pants n socks,

Me standing in 2 many court docks.

Sorry Dad for all the knocks on ur door,

Cops raiding ur home, crimes 2 the core.

All my clothes thrown on the floor,

I couldn't hv got arrested any more.

It was only later on we got on,

After I left home n got on my own.

U seemed to treat me like a son,

On Thursdays, we even had some fun.

We used to hav joy down the lake,

Walking in the woods a Sunday take.

Chewing the chud for no good sake,

N fishing with our hands ffs!

U always helped me out, wen I was stuck,

Didn't matter the price in bucks.

Car crashes, n cash wen I clucked,

Any help I needed, I was in luck.

U became more of a mate than a Dad,

N this is what screws me bad.

Wish I made most of the time we had.

And it cuts me deep 2 not B ur lad.

I'll be going away soon for good,

Nothing can stop it I wish I cud.

I did something bad, I knew I wud,

So I hope we both understood.

That I love u Dad whatever I did,

Pissed disputes, cop raids n shit.

Police can do one, I'm still ur kid.

I wish my life was different, every bit.

I was going to be there at ur end,

But shits happened I can't pretend.

Not 2 B with u drives me round the bend.

I leave u with sadness hope u ken?

Sunday, 1 December 2024

Messing

Note: Its meant to be read fast a bit like a song, each stanza quickly in one go. A bit like a Kasabian song.

1, I'm messing with the enemy,

Don't need 2 sell my soul 4 free,

He's already inside of me,

Watching from a gallery.

2, he's just another trick,

Playing the devil jus 4 kicks,

He's making my brain proper sick,

Seems I'm on another trip.

3, he's running my body ill,

So I'm crushing up another pill,

As I watch, my very own blood spill,

He's got me under an evil spell.

4, my mind cant ignore,

The pain inside my inner core,

He's got me rolling on the floor,

Please, find me an entrance door.

5, he's coming 4 me, I got the fear,

Handing me, another beer,

All 2 keep my mind unclear,

Messing with my mind, pls help me dear!

6, he's destroyed my mental health,

I think i need some proper help,

But no1 seems 2 want 2 help,

So I'm stuck on this running belt.

7, it's coming towards the end,

I can't see, around the bend,

So can u find an angel 2 send,

Or I'll be in another Sim again.

Damn!

Saturday, 30 November 2024

Simulation Theory

U can call me a joker,

A fent abused smoker.

But I got a good excuse,

This world's a game of poker.

I want to get back home,

Coz this world ain't my zone.

U can all call me mad,

But ur all NPC drones.

My world got blown up,

A nuclear war was thrown.

My body woke in a chair,

Sick, ill, this Sim is known.

I need to get out of here,

Back to the world I cheer.

I know ur all not real,

Want to make that clear.

Half u NPCs don't hv names,

I'm playing PlayStation games.

Stuck as the only RPC,

No offence this Sim is lame.

My Sim is a waste land,

NATO nuke war all planned.

But Russian hypersonics won,

N we all turned into sand.

So pls get me back home,

No more Ukrainian drones.

Need some DMT to see reality

To tell me what is known.

Stuck in a Sim that ain't mine,

U NPCs walk round just fine,

But I know this ain't reality,

I'm stuck with a bent out mind.

Need some help to get back,

Pls help me I'm on a sick rack,

My body ain't even my own,

Go on joke, n think I'm wack.

Friday, 1 November 2024

The Golden Goddess

She's the Golden Goddess,

A great writer but always modest.

Teaches us N critically honest,

One of the few I'll truly miss.

She's either mixed, coloured or black,

With pronouns that tickle my sack.

Her skin will never ever crack,

N her writing is pretty whack.

We all listen like kids,

As she lifts the literary lid.

On poetry n stories already writ,

N let's us write our own shit.

She's a full Zoom faced wonder,

Teaches us all like rumbly thunder.

Lightening fast we're no longer dumber,

N she ignores R odd writing blunder.

Our lessons R always a blast,

Making us write gold, so very fast.

Puts her college kids on their own arse,

So I jus hope, my own poems will last.

The Golden Goddess was a gift to me,

She helped set my own writing free.

But from Covid, we all had 2 flee,

To Facebook, phones n PCs.

So to Michele, I'll always say,

That on my very own final day.

I will appreciate u deeply always,

For allowing my work 2 B displayed.

Saturday, 26 October 2024

Goodbye Mum

Goodbye, goodbye,

Goodbye Mum.

I'm so sorry, sorry for,

Being your son.

Your roast dinners,

Were something to boast.

But I'm sad u never got to live,

Ur days out by the coast.

I know u probably stayed,

To look out over me.

N I'm so sorry for them cops,

Breaking in urs with no key.

I know I was no good,

At following your rules.

N I shouldn't hv been misled,

By so many idiots n fools.

You taught me so well,

Probably better than school.

But life is a bitch,

N I just acted the fool.

The life that I wanted,

Just wasn't in store.

N the life that I lived,

I just couldn't handle no more.

But I love u so Mum,

Just pls know that it's true.

N all u did for me,

Was more than u knew.