SKЯ3W

Skr3w, screw, barney McSkrew,

Screw them all and screw u too,

Been in a screw job n not 2 few,

Diablo witch screwed r whole crew.

Coz a screws a joe pullin u out of bed,

Stand by the wall put ur hands on ur head,

Open ur pockets and spins out ur bed,

A tru screw never 4gets a word uve said.

Coz a screw in the jaws pain u can't ignore,

Dental abcess my raw jaw is sore,

Too many meds n the floor is my whore,

N I can't even KO headbutting the door.

Coz a screw under my tyre is nothing new,

A skank neighbours plan n I've had a few,

Stuck roadside wiv nothing to do,

Ur wallets blank n ur mates r too.

Coz a screw on a driver is a tool jus right,

Always beware of that tool in a fight,

Plunge that shank n rotate it tight,

Bein pulled close as ur pupils unlight.

Coz a screw with a bird cud be overdue,

It could be the best screw u never knew,

Unthread ur stress the best u can do,

Unpop ur cork as ur nads turn blue.

Coz a screw aint a nail still I nailed it gd,

If u had to Google then u misunderstood,

That the thread of this Scr3w was meant 2 b good,

It only rhymes becoz I Skrewed it good.

© 2020 Rob Reid in pain after the dentist put a filling on top of an abscess!

No Smart Shoes

I got no smart shoes, but got food,

You want some food?

I got dark or white, it's up 2 you,

It's food for the soul, and my souls well abused,

My shoes don't shine but yours don't too.

Coz I got no roof over ma head and ma cars ma bed,

I park down alleys, n pull ma coat over ma head.

My friends pretend, but don't let me rest ma legs,

I beg n beg but get ripped 2 shreds.

Coz a friend in need is a friend who thieves,

I've woke before 2 find friends on their knees.

Sifting through ma tings, taking what they need.

My pills n cash your supposed 2 leave.

I'd tell u the truth but never know where 2 begin.

My shoes may not shine, but 100% they're mine,

Never going down 4 a heist on Clarkes, damn stupid crime.

Treds cleaner than my bed n well past their prime,

But if anyone mugs me off I'll happily do the time.

Coz a friend in need must be a friend with greed,

Their needs so deep, they forget you in a heart beat.

A place to stay isn't a doggy treat,

They'd rather call the law than let me rest my feet.

So do you want these shoes, I say exist?

A pair of feet golden from the sun, but moon blessed.

Ten rough blistered toes, that the devils kissed,

Bore a baby from the Gods, but ill conceived, half pissed.

I maybe bat fuck crazy, but mans no joke full toke,

I fill small rooms with fumes ignore signs not 2 smoke, 

But I'm still a stand up man, n all round good bloke,

Yet if u rob me once you'll die in my choke.

Coz I done time, thrown lines and stood in line 4 brine,

What's yours is mine, and what's mine is mine.

I got an eye 4 wheels n never paid a speeding fine,

Cash on tap whoever said it don't pay well crime?

So go walk a mile, in my soiled wet shoes, 

Go slow, two by two, like rats led by a flute.

Tred my well worn path with a laugh, n give that man a toot,

N don't be the slow fat cow that farmers shoot.

Coz a friend in need is a friend who bleeds,

Shared blood in a stall, passed works beneath.

For a supposed friend, he could had said goodbye with a tweet,

Coz a year then passed before he was found dead in the street.

Coz I aint got no smart shoes, but have you?

Or are your treds worn dead, a sick man with no clue.

A suited fat lawyer, pimping a room with no view,

No win no fee, but still got time 2 sue.

Coz I count the real friends on my pinks, from head 2 toe,

A real friend will lend n don't put on a show, 

That's why I don't have real friends, they're a bar set too low,

N I walk these smart shoes alone on da path I know.

© 2024 - All Rights Reserved - Robert Reid

Flash Fiction - Don't

Don't" Laura begged, her lovely long blonde locks flowing in the cool night wind. She wanted me to stay but I knew I couldn’t. 

She'd cheated on me for the last time. I couldn't keep on forgiving her; this was the last time. She had to understand how how much pain she had caused.

"Don't" a teary-eyed Laura pleaded once more, her hand gripped my arm ever more tightly. 

However, I had already decided to let her go, and watched as she faded away into the dark sky, clutching and grabbing frantically at empty air.

© 2024 - All Rights Reserved - Robert Reid

This was my competition entry into a 100 word Flash Competition 

Star

I was in a gang of £20 rock stars,

Wanted 2 go to the moon but never got far.

Battered spaceship like a 2nd hand car,

Werner von Braun R NAZI science Tsar.

Quick sprinkles of ash from the back of my hand,

Flying off to space but got no NASA grandstand.

Clever enough to split atoms like the double slit,

Quantum flux waves, quarks spark a million bits.

I had Einstein's mind but the sense of a twit,

And 2 wonky legs both shattered to bits.

Still I checked the box for Schrödinger's cat,

Whether dead or alive, matters a fact.

Probably starved should hv thrown him a rat,

But then he's only dead if you hadn't checked that.

I said I'm gonna sort it out, and I gave God a shout,

Long waited 30 years but never heard nought.

It's bn a long time n I've survived many a drought,

Was Wuhan bat crazy masking just 2 go out.

My eyes got double blots N my minds gone blank,

My tongue got tied up in a chat that wasn't 2 Frank.

Got the sniffles and a cough from the rising damp,

Send U a card from space if I can afford the stamps.

But still nothing more than a yellow rocket star man,

Flying 2 the moon as fast as R wallets say we can.

Rocket fuels cheap bicarb powder stale like spam,

And electronic wiring that's as old as your gran.

One day R ships going 2 stop giving NASA's radar blips,

CIA's gonna make sure R boosters explode in2 a million bits.

Paranoia top mad too much time floating 2 think a bit,

Before our oxygen runs out and we all choke 4 shit.

It was an important mission, I was sure we could land,

Neil Armstrong's lodge helped draw us a plan.

Shame Kubrick wasn't around 2 put the film in the can,

Still did R best on Area 51's banned desert sand.

So did I wish I had changed jobs N become a man in a suit,

Door to door salesman briefcase full of scams 2 boot.

College wasn't hard so I always had time 2 toot,

N every boss was a thief so chose a life harder to loot.

© 2024 Robert Reid – All Rights Reserved

Tatooed Skeleton

There's a killer on the road

And my brains on overload. 

The big C finally got 2 u,

And our friendship was true. 

Liver n kidneys infiltrated, 

So no organs R donated. 

You may take the piss, 

But I'll blow one last kiss. 

It may be from far away. 

From 1 2 another hospital stay. 

He was my best friend, 

But his times come to an end. 

He was just a Tatooed Skeleton,

Rattling bones it's hell again. 

It's just too late, 

He's got no luck n a bad fate.  

Play a slow song, 

And pls sing along. 

My best mates now dead, 

Brown buttered sliced bread. 

So go butter ur own slice, 

N roll them big C dice. 

© 2024  All Rights Reserved Robert Reid

Me and my friend from school and back in the day hanging around shops, raving, toking, and causing mischief who died whilst I was in the hopsital from liver, lung and brain cancer. 

Yes, I am the good looking 16 year old on the left hand side.

Me and Luke Hewit, OSC, 1995

Go To Bed

The nurse said "go 2 bed", 

But Creepy Nicks on the Neb?

You must hv fish in ur head,

Go make me a coffee instead. 

Ur waking everyone up! 

Said the nurse with my coffee cup. 

Well sorry ur out of luck, 

N I really don't give 2 fucks. 

I've not slept for 5 nights,

My mates r all dying n I'm in fright. 

Call security if u wanna fight, 

They may punch out my lights. 

I told them I need a sleeper, 

N don't want any time machine creeper. 

If it's zopiclone u can keep it, 

I wanna a oggmie so I sleep a bit.

Ppl are being disturbed by you!

Said the agency staff with no clue. 

Go open ur bowels n hv a poo, 

Fuck it ill take some clonz 2 chew. 

Your bad language is upsetting ppl! 

Soz my lingo is street n ur unequal, 

You upset me daily n it's sequel, 

A bad start 2 the day it's prequel.

My hospital life is getting boring, 

Can't stand Jim with his snoring. 

Lesley's lost his elephant, ur choring, 

N I can't stand the cop next 2 me I'm ignoring.

Pls go 2 bed n try rest ur head! 

They wake me up all night, its a waste of a bed. 

I'd rather stay in Highdown prison instead. 

At least I'd get a kip, even if I end up dead. 

© 2024  All Rights Reserved Robert Reid