Ho Ho Ho

Ho Ho Ho,

It's Christmas no?

Eat another choclate,

N listen to my flow.

Ho Ho Ho,

Santa's slow,

Drank too much whisky,

Staked his sleigh in snow.

Ho Ho Ho,

I got ice snot cold,

I'd wipe my noggin,

But got no rags 2 blow.

Ho Ho Ho,

The Gov don't know.

Listen to the news,

Seems I got benefit woes.

Ho Ho Ho,

U got any cash 2 borrow?

I'm looking at my balance,

Seeing my overdraft grow.

Ho Ho Ho,

More crap TV shows,

Depressing Eastenders,

Suicide and Murder to go.

Ho Ho Ho,

Pull a cracker Joe.

Unwrap that tat,

It's your best present no?

Ho Ho Ho,

Crossaint honey glow,

Have another mince pie,

Stop your blood flow.

So Ho Ho Ho,

Another years game show,

We all doubled down on debt,

N hoped to win lifes lotto.

© 2023 – Robert Reid All Rights Reserved

Citrus...

The main business of Christmas,

Is keeping your kiddies their Interest,

So Santa always always wakes them up, with goodness,

and socks filled with chocolates,

and fruits filled with Citrus...

© 2021 – All Rights Reserved - Robert Reid

XMAS SKЯEW....

SKr3w Screw,

Shiny glitter n glue,

Xmas came 2 soon,

Not nuff time 2 do.

Coz im ill n cold,

Rotten bones 2 old,

Gotta get gifts, I'm told,

B4 they're all sold.

But my wallets so blank,

N gettin txts from my bank,

Im in deep shit, half sank,

N my shopping list is wank.

But its XMAS time,

Plenty of pills n wine,

But got no credit line,

So prezzies ull come frm crime.

I'm spendin whole days in bed,

Shrinks fucked wiv my meds,

N mad shits crawling my head.

But still this iz XMAS time,

I'll b fucked up from 9,

Drink all day til night,

Then watch r family all fight.

My bredrens all here,

Drinking Scotch n Beer,

My sister sits near,

Still not a word in my ear.

Coz she hates my guts,

4 old skool time heart cuts,

Her mates dead bro I knw not,

But an Elephant's memory she got.

But joy, its XMAS time,

Shop mad n get debt 4 time,

Its a messed up gd night,

N yuletide good times.

But this is Santas Skrew,

His wallnuts r cold n blu,

Rudolphs b glowing red soon,

Coz he's stuck in your flue.

So ur presents will b late,

As it's all not always up 2 fate,

Santa's bellys far too great,

N all prezzies, China slave made.

So I'll end this shit Skrew,

Coz I got fuck all else 2 do,

I'd love to Facetalk to a few,

But chose 2 write 2 r crew! 

© 2020 All Rights Reserved Robert Reid