Simulation Theory

U can call me a joker,

A fent abused smoker. 

But I got a good excuse,

This world's a game of poker.

I want to get back home,

Coz this world ain't my zone. 

U can all call me mad,

But ur all NPC drones.

My world got blown up,

A nuclear war was thrown. 

My body woke in a chair,

Sick, ill, this Sim is known. 

I need to get out of here,

Back to the world I cheer. 

I know ur all not real,

Want to make that clear.

Half u NPCs don't hv names, 

I'm playing PlayStation games. 

Stuck as the only RPC, 

No offence this Sim is lame. 

My Sim is a waste land,

NATO nuke war all planned.

But Russian hypersonics won,

N we all turned into sand.

So pls get me back home,

No more Ukrainian drones. 

Need some DMT to see reality 

To tell me what is known.

Stuck in a Sim that ain't mine,

U NPCs walk round just fine,

But I know this ain't reality,

I'm stuck with a bent out mind.

Need some help to get back,

Pls help me I'm on a sick rack,

My body ain't even my own,

Go on joke, n think I'm wack.

© 2024 - All Rights Reserved - Robert Reid

The Contract

Like Robert J I sold my soul, 

It wasn't 4 fame but 2 cut a hole. 

It wasnt at the crossroad, 

And no horned Satan glowed. 

Just a plain man in a suit, 

But that bloke sure chat cute.

That slick speaking devil n me, 

Signed a contract we agreed. 

I jus wanted 2 protect my death. 

So I sold an ounce of my flesh.

Definitely no hell for me, 

So there was no nd 2 plea. 

For wen I croak not to go to hell, 

He had me under some spell. 

There was no blood, no pain,

And yet no one can explain. 

Ambulance men confused, 

Dox N nurses all bemused.

All the old Chaplens here, 

Have been bent on my ear. 

Saying he's a evil trickster, 

There's no kind of quick fixer. 

Must b a psychotic break, 

Or maybe a schizo mistake. 

But why won't u believe, 

If u finally received.

A visit from ur deity, 

Don't u believe wat u see? 

A visit from the Devil or God, 

R u trippin wat do u find odd? 

Jus hallucinating ur belief, 

Or ur religiosity is jus disbelief. 

So don't doubt my sanity, 

Wen over half the planet agrees. 

That those opposites exist, 

Maybe my contract still exists?

© 2024 All Rights Reserved Robert Reid

Scrambled Heads

Let's go mumbling, bumbling without care,

Pink pixie queen, chose my lacey underwear. 

I make a livin pickin chicken teeth off da floor,

Den I go n fence em, 2 a sewer livin, troll of a whore. 

Coz I'm just a lil scamp, with a brain full of scrambled eggs, 

Holes n green gunk, yep I've got bad legs.

Slipped pins thru ma skin, 4 30yrs like a chore,

It's da kinda shit, I don't want 2 do no more.

Used 2 hv teeth, dat shined bright n glowed, 

But I pickaxed dem like da cavities, in dis flow, 

Mr green became too clean, n boring 4 me

But hopefully I'll get a bag of ticks, by half past 3.

So I'll post this Skrew, up bit by bit,

N If I can't rhyme the dime in time, I ain't worth shit. 

© 2023 All Rights Reserved Robert Reid

Guess Now This is Life

Dying men,

Crying friends. 

Here 2 mend, 

Near their end. 

Hot coffee,

N sticky toffee.

Don't cry n plea, 

Let's look n see.

Open PC consoles,

Have a nose.

Blood pressure rose,

Coz my Mum showed.

Mental health,

List of wealth.

Psychotic dealt,

Depressive melt.

Just met a girl,

Used 2 bang n whirl.

Now a twig hurl,

Health dealt a curl.

Nepalese nurses,

Abandonded purses.

Mooching curses,

Open hearses.

Don't pay a fee, 

NHS is free.

Nice nurses 2 see, 

All helping me.

Not that they can, 

Off 4 a scan. 

This wasn't my plan, 

But I'm on life's ban. 

Guess now this is life,

Won't be getting a wife.

Not joining lowlife, 

I'll end mine with a knife.

© 2023 All Rights Reserved Robert Reid

Light

Light, Light, turn out the lights,

Red laser beam, it shines so bright.

Fall on the floor and duck n cover,

I’ve had too much n I don’t want to suffer.

Cold sweat soup with drips of blood,

Cuts so deep it’ll be a red flood.

But the lights so bright I can’t take any more,

The 6 o’clock knock and the police at my door.

Stuck in a cell with a blue mattress,

Times flying by I wouldn’t wish this.

Cells lights so bright it burns my eyes,

I got hot nose sniffles, n red eye cry.

Knock, knock, that 6 o’clock knock,

I used to wake up at 6 and hide any food I got.

Psyched out, it’s been too many years,

I wake at 6, thinking the doorbell rang in my ears.

I hate this life and I hate this shiz,

But two weeks clean n I’ll be dreaming of this.

Can’t help myself but I can help others,

Easy to preach with a penny of b undiscovered.

I sneak in the bog anytime I like,

Pull down my pants and turn on the light.

Need a long green I got to dig so deep,

Into my flesh I hunt veins to sleep.

Dream, dreams, please let me dream,

Vivid opiate dreams of a life so clean.

But I can’t stop, I’m stuck, stuck to the clock,

Can’t go 8 hours without starting a cluck.

Rattle n roll, n a devil jacked soul,

But I got to suffer if I want outta this hole.

They say some have done it but I don’t believe it’s true,

The only ones who escaped, went out cold and blue.

So I got this light in my head so bright,

I want to turn it off n say hello to the night.

But it’s a 3-month hunt for sleep you see,

Go to bed at 1 n wake at 3.

So I got excuses n plans at least a mile high,

N if u try n force me, I’ll pretend I’ll try.

But the river of dark, it runs so deep,

When u find my body, it will be the only thing to keep.

So turn off the lights I like living in the dark,

It’s a life for a few and it’s no entertainment park.

© 2022 All Rights Reserved Robert Reid

Mental Health Week....

Someone told me it was mental health week,

Apologises that I've not even made a tweet,

The health of my mind at the mo is pretty unstable n weak,

It breakable n shakable n I don't really want to speak.

Take ur pills, take ur pills, is all I can remember,

When I was depressed n psychotic for 20 odds years Jan 2 December.

Bi-polar, Schizo, told I'd be paranoid 4 forever,

No med reviews, so stopped takin those sweets, GPs ain't so clever.

Life on Olanzapine, Rispirodone n other Fluorine based meds,

Only make u fat, slows u down n fucks with ur head.

Prob why Hitler, Stalin, CIA used it 2 cold walk enemies dead,

Slept 23 a day, even behind the wheel, so lucky not 2 b dead.

So I take what I need to get me up every day,

But I could easily spend life under the duvet wishing it away.

Cops n stitches, n a 5 stretch for jus getting thru the day,

But I dont give a shit coz I'm in prison either way.

Dont ever sneak up on me n surprise me from behind,

Probably find out how quick 2 fingers make u blind.

I can't handle stress n my bodies only half kind,

Had more holes put in me than 3 whore houses combined.

Now I'm falling apart n COVIDS blocking my health,

Multiple ops cancelled coz DAVOS trebled their wealth.

So I hv to cop block, runnins daily, sneaky n stealth,

But every non prescribed med slowly corrodes my health.

So mentally or physically I'm wrecked beyond prime,

N wen I run out of p's n ill I'd happily do the time.

Courts local paper journos wud only see a standard crime,

Mitigating circumstances wouldn't even warrant a line.

Coz my mental health needs fixing but no1 seems to care,

N I stay stuck in this flat alone no1 2 talk to or share.

My mental health nds mending but shrinks wont get out there chair,

N that's why my minds goin 2 b the end of me, pls God hear this prayer. 

© 2021 Robert Reid – All Rights Reserved

Do The Largactil Shuffle....

It's close to midnight, and I see something in the dark,

It's my cell mate, he's having a noisy toilet fart.

I try to tell him nicely, to shut his loud asshole up,

Then he gets really angry, and we start to have a ruck.

Coz it's a Largactil, Largactil shuffle night,

A look into your empty eyes, and all they see is blight.

Coz you wobble to the left, and you dribble to the right,

Your walking like a sloth and your head just don't feel right.

But when the shit wears off I'm angry, and all I want to do is fight,

The guard's shields all go up, it's my turn to knock em down just right.

Bowling is a skill, but with screws, it's a powder keg,

Try to get 3 down in one, then grab tight on 2 a nearby leg,

If you're lucky n get a strike, they all plead n start to beg,

Promise 2 let you go free, as long as u let go of their peg.

But then the doctor comes in ur pad and he says its medication time,

I know what he means, but I don't need more time.

So they strap me to the bed and they, pull that plunger out,

A pin so long and thick, its contents make u wanna shout.

The lovely blue liquid in the barrel is shinning like a light,

Then they shove it in my ass cheek and pump the contents in nice n tight.

Then I'm drooling like a mong, and I got no mood to move,

And the guards who I rattled earlier, r laughing 2 the groove.

Coz this is Largactil, a Largactil shuffle night,

I'm walking like a mong, and I got no mood to fight.

I'm wobbling to the left, and dribbling on my top,

I got hunger pains, n want this liquid cosh to stop.

I try 2 eat some toast, but most falls on the floor,

And I think about it hard, and I don't wanna be here no more.

Coz a liquid cosh is plight, but it'll see u through the night,

Then u wake up like a mong, and suffer double sight.

I want to walk in a straight line, but my bodies got no fight,

N then I suddenly realise, that they used this cosh just right.

© 2021 – All Rights Reserved - Robert Reid

Private Record

This private record,

It plays for me,

No-one else.

The words have special  meanings,

Only I can hear.

Everyone else is just blinded by the noise.

Only I can understand,

The hidden meaning of the band.

The secret message is getting me going,

Winding me up.

How do they fucking know?

Why are they singing this about me?

I turn around to see if anyone has noticed.

They haven’t.

Its safe, for a while.

I have received the message and noted mentally,

Every single word that was meant for me.

Now I turn it off.

I don’t want anyone else to hear,

My secret song, my hidden fear.

© 2002 All Rights Reserved Robert Reid